So, I am feeling pretty much uninspired today.  I've been to work, I've done my exercise, I've started my laundry, and I've done a little crocheting, but what I'd really like to do now, I'm not sure.  No, actually--I'd like to eat.  But I can't, yet.  So I'm trying to solace myself with hot, unsweetened decaf tea.  Which isn't much of a comfort food, but at least it probably won't make me feel any hungrier.

This past week has been absolutely horrible for weightloss.  I've had some plateaus before, but they would last a few days, put me behind a little, and then go away.  In this case, I think I actually weighed more this morning than what I did a week ago.  On the other hand, ironically, I've suddenly had people noticing and commenting on my weight loss.  I'd say it's the clothes, except that I've been wearing different clothes for weeks now.  So, who knows?  I've certainly been doing my share of working out, and if I haven't absolutely stuck to my calorie counts, the difference ought to be negligible (say a few hundred calories off over the course of the week--and it should take 500 calories a day to make a pound of difference).

This past weekend was busier than usual for me.  It was the weekend of a big library program--so big it can't actually be held at the library (although they have plans to build a big enough room next year).  This means lugging a lot of stuff to another location, and makes tech support extremely difficult, especially when the place we held the program didn't really offer any of their own.  Dress rehearsal was pretty alarming--the only thing that got rehearsed was the kids' choir, and they didn't sound very inspiring.  We actually had to bring a portable sound system in order to run the majority of the audio-video stuff (and I'm much indebted to the director of the kids choir, who not only knew how to set it up for us, but did just that), and even that gave us grief a couple of time during the program (since we didn't have it for dress rehearsal, and, therefore, had no opportunity to work the bugs out of it).  However... the program, on the whole, went over pretty well.  The person sitting near me was really annoyed that I kept blocking her view whenever I stood up to operate the video camera, and made some very audible rude comments (chiefly annoying because they could end up on the sound for the video), but I think everyone else had a pretty good time.  In fact, the band that supplied a lot of our music actually ASKED to come back next year, from what I've heard since.  So that's a pretty high compliment.  And as I said, we hope to be able to hold the program "in house" next year.  Which could still have its drawbacks, depending on the kind of facility we're able to build... but I expect it will be loads easier to manage.  And so much simpler than having to lug stuff around.

One of the workouts I've been doing lately involves some lunges, but I think I'm going to have to swap it for something else.  Probably I'm just not doing them quite right, but, once again, my knees have been giving me trouble.  This time the right knee is the more bothersome one.  I'm hoping that if I do the stepper instead, my knees will be OK with that.  I know it will give me a good workout--just very monotonous and boring.  But, hey, I can't have my walking (which I enjoy) spoiled by knee troubles.

Well, as I take my walks, I often just let my mind kind of wander.  Occasionally there will be something it is trying to process that gets in there and keeps going around and around and around.  But other times it flits carelessly from one point to another.  Today was one of those randomly-flitting days.  (Bullets look too tidy for how my thoughts all kind of run together, but they make it a bit easier, I suppose, on anyone bothering to read this.)

• I thought a bit about my story ideas and how I could integrate my walks into them. 
• I thought about the foggy uncertainty of my future and how dissatisfying that is. 
• I was trying to expand on the thought, which I think is fairly profound, that The Word Is Sufficient.  The Word as the Bible and as Jesus.  But I wasn't having much success expanding on it.  Because at the moment I am not feeling very satisfied, and it just makes me think I'm not really connecting to the Word as I should be, but I'm not sure what angle I'm missing. 
• I also thought about the Cross.  I was thinking of a song that talks about the Cross as an expression of the love of God.  But it isn't just that.  It's also an expression of the awfulness of sin.  We have to understand both, I think, to really benefit from it. 
• And I thought about dead leaves, and how they smell all right on the ground, so what makes the great big pile of them (which is being made in the park) so stinky? Is there something else in the great big pile?  Or does a different sort of chemical reaction occur?  Or is it just one of those odors that is pleasant in small quantities and unpleasant in large quantities? 
• I also thought about mushrooms and whether I want to add a field guide to mushrooms to my collection of field guides, and I think I concluded that I would eventually like to do so, but it isn't urgent.  (What about field guides to berries?  Do they have such a thing?  I think I would eventually like to get a book I saw on identifying edible plants.) 
• I thought about litter, and how I don't really want to be bothered to pick up litter when I don't have anything handy to put it in--but should I try to always have a Wal-mart bag or something with me for that purpose?  I never seem to think of it at the right time...
• And I found a big shiny fake coin on the path, near where, last week, I saw a black knit glove.  But I didn't see the black knit glove this week.  Maybe someone picked it up, or maybe it just got buried more deeply under the leaves.  I moved the coin to a place where it would be less likely to disappear. 
• A couple of places in the path I found lots of black and white feathers.  Smallish feathers.  But I couldn't decide what they came from, or if it seemed to have gotten away.  I didn't see any guts or bones or anything, but it WAS an awful lot of feathers... 
• I thought about people I would like to talk to, but didn't really get anywhere with that thought, because thinking about it still didn't inspire me with any clever way to start a conversation, and, besides, I don't know if it would be welcome if I did, and, anyway, it probably wouldn't end up being all that exciting of a conversation if I had to come up with some lame way to start it. 
• I saw one other person on my walk, when I came out of the woods for a few yards.  He was just sitting on a park bench overlooking the pond.  I wondered if he worked there (especially when, shortly thereafter, I came to some recently-cut trees), or had simply come to enjoy the park, and whether he was bored or lonely or just enjoying a nice break.  And then I forgot about him, until just now. 
• I thought about how to walk so that my knee would not bother me, and worried about hurting it if I tripped on a root or rock hidden under the leaves, which did happen a couple of times, but not so as to damage my knee. 
• And I thought again about rue-anemones, and about tall bell flowers (of which I saw one) and moth mullein (which I might have seen, or maybe it was a primrose), and poison ivy (of which I see less and less). 
• And I thought about how to vary my route, and got very temporarily lost, but soon was able to get back to where I knew where I was.  And I thought it would be nice to have a trail map which could be superimposed over the image of the woods in Google Earth so that I could make some kind of stab at figuring out how long of a walk I'm actually taking. 
• And the weather, though cloudy, was pleasantly mild, and really very nice for walking.  And there weren't too many spider web strands to catch on my hands, face, and clothing. 
• And then I got back to the library and walked once around the wetlands for good measure, and didn't really think about much of anything at all except trying to find the firmer spots on the path, and wondering if there's any way they can keep weeds from growing up through it. 
• And I got back to my desk and guzzled a bottle of water while looking at Facebook, in case anybody had posted anything interesting or important. 
• And then I came home. 
• Which is a pretty typical after-work scenario for me.

Now I need to go finish my laundry, and then maybe I'll go back to crocheting, since I have two afghans now in progress.  One is made up of chains of rings, which will eventually be attached to each other, side by side.  They are dark green, light green, and tan, and will be attached with dark brown.  The other is just row upon row of color in horizontal stripes, with texture variations that create diagonal stripes.  It is deep red, gold, a leafy green, and brown.  The first is for my next sister who is turning 20 (in February), and the second is for my dad.  I started the second one before finishing the first because I was waiting for my sister to pick out the third color (tan) for the first.

Oh yes, I was going to go do my laundry...

I have decided that when it comes to social interaction, there are two schools of thought.

One is the official one you see in ettiquette books.  The most polite person is the one who can get the other person to do all the talking.  Thus, you ask leading questions, prompt and respond as needed, but rarely volunteer information.  The idea is that you wow the other person with your great listening skills, and by showing great interest in everything they have to say.  Since you never give information that isn't asked for, you feel reasonably certain that everything you say will be of interest to your audience.  However, if someone is too ready to talk without your "help," then you probably think they are a bit of a bore.  You are too polite to ever interrupt them if they get warmed up and think that you really want to hear their life story, but secretly you wish that they would start demonstrating some listening skills themselves.  And if they interrupt you, it's shocking--even offensive.  You conclude that for some reason, they really just don't care about you or what you have to say, in which case it really isn't worth your while to try to get better acquainted.

The other goes pretty much in the opposite direction.  This school of thought is that someone who does all the asking and never volunteers any information themselves is either a bore, or trying to hide something, or thinks they're better than you.  You really want the other person to do their share of talking, but you would feel rude to start asking them questions.  Instead, your gesture of friendship is to offer voluntary information, and hope that this will make them feel at ease and inclined to open up without having to have information dragged out of them.  You really don't mind if they interrupt you, and worry that your conversation is boring without their input, but you are not going to force them to talk if they don't want to.  Still, you find that some people are awfully hard to get acquainted with, and can't figure out why they act so interested in what you have to say, and then avoid you.  You conclude that it's hopeless--you've done your best, but they evidently don't trust you or feel comfortable around you--probably think they're too good for you or something.

Well, I think most people are sensible enough to bend a little according to the sort of people they are with.  You find that sometimes it pays to volunteer a little harmless personal information or opinions.  Sometimes interruptions may actually be welcomed.  Just because someone doesn't ask for your opinion doesn't necessarily mean that it isn't of interest to them.  At the same time, it probably is a good idea to practice listening as well as talking skills.  You shouldn't have to ask personal questions, but after stating an opinion, you could tack on a friendly, "So what do you think?"--and then wait long enough to show that you mean business.  Pay particular attention when a quiet person speaks--it may be a much greater effort for them, and therefore much more frustrating to be ignored.  And once someone volunteers a personal opinion, try not to immediately turn it into an argument, even if you disagree.  In general, I think that finding common ground is much more satisfying than carefully delineating all areas of disagreement--and it's almost always possible if both parties are willing to try (especially if you are not required to confine yourselves to a single topic of discussion).  And whatever your conversational style, sometimes you might just have to try to figure out what the other person is interested in talking about!  Pay enough attention to the other person to figure out if they are quiet-interested, quiet-bored, or maybe just quiet-tired.  Or if they are chatty-friendly, chatty-selfish, or maybe just chatty-nervous.

But I expect you knew all that already anyway.  It was just something that came to me as I was going to bed last night, but it was rather late, and I decided that going to bed was more important than floating it out for discussion at that moment.

The rue-anemone is not the showiest of flowers.  Plain white, and perhaps an inch in diameter, one blossom is not really all that noticeable.  However, it is a plant that can spread into large clumps, creating a bigger impact by producing dozens of flowers at a time.  It is also a very hardy flower, one of the first to bloom in the spring, and--as I have recently discovered--one of the last to bloom in the fall.

The rue-anemone does not love me.  Not one has ever bloomed just for me.  Indeed, it is not even aware that I exist.  It simply carries on doing what it was made to do because that's all it CAN do.  But when I get an unexpected glimpse of the hardy little flowers, I smile to myself.  And it is most cooperative in letting me take its picture!

So I don't get very many footprints here, and most of the ones I do get seem to be from people looking up pictures of baby parakeets.  I get parakeet picture footprints from all over the world!  And it isn't even a very good picture--slightly out of focus, and low resolution.  But it does show five sizes of babies with the mother.

I've decided that I need to start working out a little more intensely.  My average weight loss for the last month was only about a pound and a half a week, and while that'll still get me to my goal, it could drag the process out a whole lot longer, which I really don't want.

We had friends over again this weekend: the winsome world-traveler, Esther Sh. from Chicago, and Micah C., possibly only the second guy I've ever met who did not appear to be at least slightly intimidated by a family of so many girls.  They talk foreign languages for the fun of it, and make me think it would be fun to study French or German some day.  And today Ashley B. with her two darling little nodlets (children), one of whom has been known to smuggle a kitten home under her jacket in the dark, and another who might be considered either very demanding or very generous with his goodby hugs and kisses...  Also a very quiet guy, Tyler P., who, if he listens as much as he says little, might be considerably better acquainted with us by now than we are with him.  Ashley and Co. and Tyler were only here this afternoon, but Micah and Esther were here last night as well.  We took a walk in the dark last night, and it was much nicer than the walk I had taken earlier in the day to get mail.  (For one thing, the weather had improved.  For another thing, I was in good company.)  It was the sort of evening that made me want to skip down the road and sing.  So I did (but not all at once).  We all ran a bit as well.  (However, I don't think my sore muscles today are from that.  They are from the workout I did in the morning.)  We also sang and/or played instruments together, which is a lovely thing to do with friends, provided you either know the sames songs or are good at learning them on the fly...

We (but not said company) had love feast after church this morning--a delight to those who are not counting calories, and a trial to those who are.  While I was washing the dishes afterwards, I gave Mrs. C. a day-by-day report on my trip to Colorado.  Hopefully, she will be able to see my pictures on Facebook.  When we came home, Hannah was here with her friends.  They've left now, as Ashley and Co. had a birthday party to attend, and Esther Sh needs to catch a train in South Bend.  But not before we had time to enjoy a bit of sunshine and the lovely fall leaves...

I've been making considerable progress on the afghan I'm crocheting for Abigail's 20th birthday, but I'm afraid I will be needing more yarn.  At least it can be another color, so I don't have to worry about trying get the exact same brand or anything.  After that, if I am not totally sick of crocheting, I would like to crochet another afghan for myself, in warm, rich, colors--except I don't think I can get the colors I want from the limited selection at the CC Walmart.  Which is very annoying, because there don't seem to be any other stores in CC that carry yarns at all.  Oh well, no rush on that.  It'll take me a while yet to finish Abigail's, and this isn't the best time to be spending money anyway.

My car went for an oil change this past week, and I had them check out a couple of other things in the process.  Well, what with this and that, it will end up being quite a hefty bill.  I could probably cut a few corners, but I think in the long run it will be better to go ahead and get the work done.  I allowed for the possibility, when I first got the car, of having a lot of these kinds of things to deal with, and ended up with less than I expected.  But at this point I wasn't really anticipating quite so much.  Oh well, I wasn't planning to get another camera or laptop this winter anyway.  I just wish I knew a good way to make a little extra cash...  Why do I seem to lose all sense of creativity or adventure as soon as I try to think along those lines?

The baby birds are pretty well fledged out now, and are looking very cute!  If you are on Facebook, be sure to take a look at my pictures.  They love attention, although they can be a bit scratchy when clutching one's hand or arm...

Well, I'm ready to get off here now.  Just trying to decide between studying Greek, reading a book, or crocheting... at the moment, they are about equally appealing, and equally likely to be forsaken if another, more interesting, idea should pop into my head.  (And I don't think working on my story will be that other, more interesting, idea.)

This has definitely been an up-and-down sort of week.  It's good to be home, but I miss the stimulation of getting to know interesting people outside my usual circle.  I love my job, but I miss being able to sleep in.  I'm glad to be able to weigh myself again, and there's some satisfaction in being back to normal calorie counting, but there are no mountains in which to hike around here, and the weather has been mostly rainy since I got home.  Well, we can't ever have everything we like at once...

I finally made an Amazon.com order, using my two birthday gift certificates as well as some of my own money.  Here is a list of what I ordered (for anyone who likes lists).

Petersons First Guides...

• ...to Insects of North America
• ...to Trees
• ...to Wildflowers: Northeastern and North-central North America
• ...to Birds of North America

Three more in-depth flower books:

• A Field Guide to Wildflowers of Northeastern and North-Central North America (Peterson)
• National Audubon Society Field Guide to North American Wildflowers--Eastern Region
• Newcomb's Wildflower Guide: An Ingenious New Key System for Quick, Positive Field Identification of the Wildflowers, Flowering Shrubs and Vines of N (This one is a bit risky, come to think of it, because the title is truncated in such a way that I'm not sure if I got the right region or not.)

A couple of Greek study books:

• The New Analytical Greek Lexicon
• It's Still Greek to Me: An Easy-to-Understand Guide to Intermediate Greek

I think about half of these have shipped by now, and I actually received the last one on the list in today's mail.

I went to Open Mic night at the Blue Lion last night.  Hardly anyone else was there.  I actually got up and sang a few song a capella, since nobody else had anything very polished either (Vreneli was just up there improvising for a while).  And I worked on my crocheting.  And I read a book I found there, which I subsequently bought so that I could give it to Hannah to add to her massive pile of books to read (*wicked chuckle* ...but hey, it's the sequel to a book she said she liked).

I've been sorting and getting rid of clothes this week.  Well, our friends in Indy gave us some clothes that fit me, which emboldened me to actually get rid of others.  And yesterday I went to Goodwill to get a couple of tops to match the skirts I got.  I still have a large pile of clothes to sort through, though--the smaller clothes I had in the back of my closet from the last time I lost weight.  Some of them I can just about fit into already.  Others will fit me later.  I might even want to get rid of some of them, depending how ratty they are.  I really don't need more than about one set of ratty clothes at this point in my life.  Oh, and I got rid of a Wal-mart bag full of socks.  My sock drawer was getting way too crowded. 

Once my clothes are all sorted out, then I have to tackle various other random accumulations in my room.  Happy happy, joy joy.  I'd take more stuff to the attic, but that's what some of my sisters did when they fixed up their room, and it is now practically impossible to turn around in the attic, let alone to stash anything more up there.  Actually, I think the other girls did an extremely irresponsible job of just jamming things in without regards to the fact that the space needs to be shared.  Consequently, I am hoping to be able to exert enough pressure on them (directly or indirectly) that they are forced to either get rid of some stuff or at least organize it a little better.

Anyway, I think I'm ready to tackle my daily workout, after which it will be time to tackle chores and clothes-sorting.  The sun is shining today for a change, so I might actually take a walk this time.  Ooh, but I'm HUNGRY again today!  *sigh*